Mid week thoughts

 Ok so I’m going on a soapbox here…. Something has been really bugging me the past few days.  More so for my own therapy than your reading pleasure… I’m going to let my feelings out here.  I really really appreciate everyone who has supported me through the first few weeks of my training (Emily, Amanda, Natalie, my mom… Thank you!).  It is difficult for most people to understand what I’m doing, heck I don’t really understand all the specifics of a Figure competition.  It’s also difficult for most people to understand why I’m doing this. 

So here’s my chance to tell you why:

•         I’m looking for a challenge. 
•        I’m looking for an achievable goal. 
•        I want to feel proud of an accomplishment. 
•        I want to learn how to maintain a healthy lifestyle. 
•        I want to do something that will truly put me in the best physical shape of my life. 
•        I want to push my body to be as healthy and strong as it can be. 
•        Vainly, I want to look hot as hell in a swimsuit.  I think if I put in all the hard work then I deserve to reap the aesthetic benefits and feel good about my body. 

These are NOT reasons why I’m doing the training program:  (hahaha that kinda just reminded me of Borat.  Your suit is NOT black)

• for a guy in my life
• to loose weight
• to look like a body builder
• to make this my full time job

So recently I’ve heard comments from people who don’t support what I’m doing.  And this is my rebuttal to them and to the ones who don’t have the courage to say it to my face.  Everyday I feel like I hear women complaining about their bodies… I hate my thighs, I want a flat stomach, look at these wings flapping when I wave my arm.   Well guess what ladies…. This didn’t happen over night.  This happened because you did not take care of your bodies the way should have been for quite sometime.  I feel that it is fair for me to say this because I was that same lady a year and a half ago.  I didn’t take the time or put forth the effort to care for my body.  And now I’m doing that and I feel fantastic.  I’m loving the shape and body transformation that I’m seeing.  Sure, it is really hard work, and maybe not all of it is completely necessary to make some changes for your own body.  But a little bit of hard work will go a long way.  Take some time for yourself.  Appreciate yourself. Respect your body.  Just make a commitment to do something for you everyday.  Be a little selfish.  You don’t have to put family, friends, and work ahead of your well being all the time.  Adding a little bit of exercise or making wiser food choices will exponentially increase your self-confidence.  I promise if you make a few small, healthy changes in your daily life, your smile will be brighter, you’ll have more good hair days, you’ll get a youthful pep back in your step.   It happened for me so I know that it can happen for anyone else out there.  All you need is a commitment to treat yourself to a happier lifestyle.  Who wouldn’t want to be happier?

Also,  I know we look at magazines, tv shows and movies… we gawk at celebrities and models… how did she get that body?  She must never eat… Well maybe she just has good genes…. Well you know what the answer is… she cares about her body.  She doesn’t eat fast food 3, 5, or 7 times a week.  She doesn’t watch 5 hours of TV a day while lying on the couch eating potato chips or pretzels dipped in nutella (yum!)  She doesn’t cringe at the thought of hard work.  Yeah, sure maybe it’s her job to stay in shape.  But maybe that should be everyone’s part time job.  I was in that same seat just a few months ago.  I decided that I wanted a fantastically fit and healthy body.  So I made a plan… decided to set a goal, set a strict diet, and intense workout plan.  Now I’m about a month into my plan and I’m seeing amazing results.  Maybe I don’t realize it everyday, but hearing comments and compliments from others truly reinforces my drive to succeed.  Here’s the problem… I don’t always get good comments.  Recently I’ve heard that I shouldn’t be doing this… that I’m too skinny, that bones are starting to pop out of my body.  You know what… I’ll probably never crochet a blanket or knit a scarf.  But I’m not gonna hate on my friends that do.  At first, these comments crushed me…. This made me want to quit because I didn’t want to be judged by others.  But now it has fired me up.  It has given me the fuel I need to keep fighting.  I hate to say this, because I don’t know the true thoughts in others’ heads….. but I think that the people who aren’t supporting me are jealous of the fact that I can set a difficult, almost impossible goal for myself and fight tooth and nail everyday to become one step closer to that goal.  These people must know deep down in their hearts that they don’t have the strength, desire, and dedication to do something like this.  Each negative comment I hear will become one more rep in the weight room, one hundred more calories burned, one more tasty temptation defeated. 

I’m proud of my accomplishments so far in my training.  I’m keeping my eyes on the prize.  I’m ready to get out there on the day of my competition and dominate. 

Here’s the bottom line… if you’re unhappy with me look in the mirror and see if you’re happy with yourself.  If you aren’t then do something about it…. If I can make the changes that I have in the past eighteen months, then I know anyone can do it.  I’m no superhero…. But I’ve decided to do this for myself, no one else.  I’m doing this to build my self-confidence.   I encourage you to do the same and maybe next time you look in the mirror you’ll say “Damn, I look good”.